Free PDF The Loving Push: How Parents and Professionals Can Help Spectrum Kids Become Successful Adults, by Debra Moore Ph.D.

Free PDF The Loving Push: How Parents and Professionals Can Help Spectrum Kids Become Successful Adults, by Debra Moore Ph.D.

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The Loving Push: How Parents and Professionals Can Help Spectrum Kids Become Successful Adults, by Debra Moore Ph.D.

Free PDF The Loving Push: How Parents and Professionals Can Help Spectrum Kids Become Successful Adults, by Debra Moore Ph.D.

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Review

The loving push is hands down, the best autism book aimed at late teens (through to mid-twenties and sometimes beyond). If you have one of these kids already, this is the book to get.... particularly if they spend "too much time" on the computer and/or in their bedroom. I really can't praise this book enough. - Life with Aspergers BlogThis dynamic duo - Dr. Grandin speaking from personal experience and Dr. Moore from a professional perspective of treating individuals with autism spectrum disorders - combine their wealth of knowledge to help parents determine just how much to push their child so they can blossom into adults that thrive. Finding just the right balance between pushing your child to do for self and helping your child too much, is always a challenge but exploring the two hundred ten pages of this book will guide parents to find what works best for their unique child. -Parent Coaching for Autism websiteDr. Moore. I have read your book "The Loving Push". I absolutely love it and highly recommend it to anyone who interacts with people on the autism spectrum. Well done!  Karen Thomas, Author of Naturally Healing Autism.Young adults on the autism spectrum face significant challenges as they transition to adulthood, with many being socially isolated, unemployed, and lacking services. More needs to be done to help them thrive to the best of their abilities and attain a high quality of life. "The Loving Push" addresses these issues with a direct, yet empathetic and positive discussion of ways we can enhance the potential of "spectrum kids" of any age to achieve productive and meaningful adult lives.The authors convey a critical message that, more than other children and youth, those on the autism spectrum must overcome "learned helplessness" and move beyond their comfort zone in order to reach their full, unique potential. Pushing is necessary," the authors write, "because those on the spectrum are unlikely to automatically pick up the mundane but necessary tasks of daily life without us intentionally nudging them and providing them with information, encouragement, and persistence." The book begins by sharing 8 inspiring profiles and using real-life stories to illustrate the three essential components of success: "Avoiding Learned Helplessness, Learning Optimism/Resisting Habitual Negative Thinking, and The Critical Impact of Mentors." The section on "Getting Families and Schools to Work Together" is especially important, given that transition planning is a critical part of preparing students for life after high school and producing the best outcomes. Young adults on the spectrum are particularly vulnerable during the initial years in the transition to adulthood when there is a shift in service provision after leaving high school. The book also addresses the issue of anxiety and depression. The authors discuss evidence-based psychotherapy approaches such as cognitive-behavioral therapy and "mindfulness" techniques to reduce stress, and improve mood. Group support for children, teens, and parents is referenced, as well as important commentary on "Psychotherapy Approaches Not Recommended." Tips and cautions about medication are also discussed."The Loving Push" devotes considerable attention to compulsive gaming and how it can turn kids on the spectrum into "media recluses". Since youth on the spectrum tend to engage in restricted and repetitive behaviors, they are at higher risk for developing addictive game play. Preoccupation with video games and trouble disengaging from them limits the opportunity for learning critical social and problem-solving skills. This Chapter warns parents and educators about the dangers of video games and screen-based media and lists steps they can take to minimize the negative effects of compulsive gaming.Parents are often surprised to learn that daily living skills are more important than autism symptoms, language or IQ when it comes to employment and life satisfaction. Part III (Preparing Your Child for Adulthood) discusses building blocks for independent living. Explicit teaching of these life skills prior to the transition to adulthood is crucial if we expect kids to have the necessary skills to live independently and negotiate adult life."The Loving Push" is a must read guide to preparing spectrum kids for a successful transition to self-reliance and independence in adult life. The book is highly recommended for parents, caregivers, and families, but also for professionals in private practice, schools, colleges/universities, and community settings who work with children, teens, and adults on the spectrum.Lee A. Wilkinson, PhD, CCBT, NCSP author of A Best Practice Guide to Assessment and Intervention for Autism and Asperger Syndrome in Schools, editor of Autism Spectrum Disorder in Children and Adolescents: Evidence-Based Assessment and Intervention in Schools and, author of Overcoming Anxiety and Depression on the Autism Spectrum: A Self-Help Guide Using CBT.

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From the Back Cover

"As a parent of children who have autism, I found this book information and thought-provoking. Sound research, practical techniques, and real-life stories give helpful advice, and interesting and tangible real-life examples of struggle, persistence, and hope make it personally engaging. Challenges are not sugarcoated, and i appreciated the authors' ability to have straightforward, honest discussions while continuing to offer hope and a positive message. Â While this book teaches parents how to give a loving push to a family member with autism spectrum disorder, it also provides a loving push for parents, teachers, and community members who care about and want to see people with autism live rewarding and fulfilling lives."Â - Jane Coburn, mother of two kids on the spectrum, Rehabilitation Specialist, and Advisor to Full Spectrum Farms, a unique community for those on the spectrum."There are some certainties in life - children on the autism spectrum will grow up and their parents won't always be with them. Â Time for planning for these events simply cannot be wasted. The Loving Push provides an excellent framework for thinking about what it takes for someone on the autism spectrum to reach for their potential. Â It reminds us all how much easier it is for us to do something for someone, rather than making sure they can and will do it for themselves. It thoughtfully pushes us to examine how we might inadvertently sabotage a successful, independent future for someone out of our love and fear. Â Adults and teenagers on the spectrum, parents of all-aged ASD children, and those who work with them would all benefit from reading and thinking about these lessons. Â It is an important piece of work that cannot be overlooked."-Barbara Russo-Sprouls, mother of an ASD daughter, Special Education teacher, and former member of the Center for Autism and Related Disorders."Providing insight to the uniqueness of those on the autism spectrum, The Loving Push offers well-rounded and practical suggestions for parents to encourage their children to utilize their gifts and talents to gain confidence and independence in purposeful and meaningful daily life skills and in academic and vocational pursuits."- Beth Aune, OTR/L, Owner-Therapist, Desert Occupational Therapy for Kids, Inc.

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Product details

Paperback: 280 pages

Publisher: Future Horizons; 1 edition (May 1, 2016)

Language: English

ISBN-10: 1941765203

ISBN-13: 978-1941765203

Product Dimensions:

6 x 0.8 x 9 inches

Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review:

4.6 out of 5 stars

85 customer reviews

Amazon Best Sellers Rank:

#11,765 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Most parents grapple with how to guide their children into a valuable and viable adulthood. Through all of my years of parenting and my time of consoling and counseling many parents in churches where I have pastored, this is a steady stream of stress. But add to this the particular struggles of autism, and the frustrations and feelings of futility can be greatly exacerbated. To restore hope and rebuild courage in parents with children on the spectrum comes a new 288 page paperback. “The Loving Push: How parents and professionals can help spectrum kids become successful adults” has co-written by Dr. Temple Grandin, author, professor and lecturer who is on the spectrum; and Dr. Debra Moore, author and psychologist who has worked with many clients dealing with HFA and Asperger’s. As the authors state, they “want to increase the odds that your child grows into an adult with a rewarding, meaningful life” (xiii).“The Loving Push” weaves together the stories of several young people who are on the autism spectrum and their parents. The accounts describe real live people overcoming and working through their specific peculiarities to become increasingly capable of independent living. Setbacks, disappointments and dark moments are described, as well as successes and advancements. Their parents and mentors also chime in voicing their strategies, relating the consequences and end results. The one shared trait in every story is that each person “was encouraged and “stretched” just outside of their comfort zone by at least one adult in their life,” which helped keep them from falling into “chronic learned helplessness” (26).Beyond the stories, the authors tackle several “how-to” approaches. For example, Chapter 2 walks the reader/mentor through ways to enable their unique child to avoid learned helplessness, to learn optimism and resist habitual negative thinking, while encouraging the mentor in the importance of their role. The significance of supportive adults is drummed through the book from cover-to-cover, especially adults who blend “being a positive role model, a source of advice or information, and someone who” expects “effort and accountability” (33). Grandin and Moore also address ways to help end a child’s bad habits, stretch them out of their comfort zones, and assist them to break out of chronic anxiety and a “don’t care” attitude.One of the critical chapters in “The Loving Push” addresses the danger of compulsive electronic gaming and how it can turn kids on the spectrum into “media recluses”. The authors make a careful distinction between recreational and compulsive gaming. They work the reader through the ways gaming affects children’s’ brains, how game developers deliberately fashion games to get compulsive or addictive responses, why ASD kids are more vulnerable to these ploys, and what to do to help the children from being consumed. One of the key components to remediating compulsive gaming is developing authentic associations. As the authors note, relationships “with real people in real time can be the best replacement for compulsive gaming” (145).“The Loving Push” is a simple read for parents and adults who are engaged with children, teens and young adults that are somewhere on the spectrum. But even parents with neurotypical children will find this volume fruitful. As a result of reading the chapter on compulsive gaming, my wife and I have initiated some important changes with our remaining children in our home. This is a book I highly recommend!My thanks to Future Horizons and Dr. Debra Moore for the free copy of “The Loving Push” used for this review sent at my request. The assessments are mine given without restrictions or requirements (as per Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255).

"The Loving Push" is a collaboration between Debra Moore and Temple Grandin that provides some advice for teaching teens and youth with Autism. Because Autism is one of my son's diagnosis, and I found one of Ms. Grandin's other books very enlightening, I purchased this. For me, after previewing the "look inside" function, there was a question in my mind about how much of this book could be applicable to my son's situation, as it seems by and large to be geared towards those with Asperger's, which is a higher functioning form of Autism than my son has. Because he also has Sotos Syndrome, and a duplication in his 5th chromosome, our situation doesn't really fit neatly into anybody's camp, so often I feel like when I read things, I have to pick out the parts that I feel can be useful in application to my son's therapy regime regardless, so I decided to take a chance on this one anyways. So this is a review is aimed at any parent who has a child who would be considered lower functioning.Without a doubt, I agree with the general premise of this book, and I think it can be generalized to kiddos with lower functioning Autism. When my son's sensory problems first emerged, they were so severe, his Occupational Therapist at the time expressed doubt that he would ever be able to tolerate the school environment. My little man, for example, puked when things touched his skin he didn't like, puked when people got to close to him, puked if he didn't like the smells...there was a time when I couldn't go anywhere in public without getting puked on, peed on, or pooped on. He's been in therapy for 2.5 years now, and I've worked tirelessly with him, gently pushing him forward by pushing him just to the threshold of a reaction on something and then pulling back, and gradually moving that line forward once his tolerance improved. Kind of basically like the parable of boiling a frog. Push them into the hot water, they will freak out and jump out. Slowly crank up the heat, and they adjust. Not that my son is a frog, or that I'm boiling him, but he was able to enter into a developmental preschool program this past year and hasn't puked on anybody so much as once. Now that doesn't mean he's cooperating with them, or that all of his other sensory challenges aren't needing to be worked with, because all of those things are. But I know that if we hadn't been gently pushing him forward, my son wouldn't have made the progress he has.I think also that in general, as a parent of a child with significant disability, speaking to parents who also may have a child with significant disability, I would also add that you shouldn't be afraid to provide some gentle encouragement to the therapy members involved. Everybody has boxes they want to put my son in, I have noticed. Many people we work with have come to conclusions about the limitations they think my son will have. And some of them may end up being right, but what I know for sure is that the moment you stop trying, you've set your own limit and that's all you're going to get. So we're shooting for all of the skills we can, and we'll be grateful for whatever we can help him to acquire, because some day he will have to navigate this world without our help. And nobody, including me at my most optimistic, thinks that he will be able to be fully independent. But if all of this gentle pushing gets him to the assisted living level as opposed to the total care level, it will have been worth it. And literally, I walk around like a 24/7 therapy session with this kiddo. I used to have hobbies, right?Which brings me to the final point from this book I think can be generalized to a kiddo who is lower functioning. As parents and caregivers, you must take care of yourselves. I don't know anybody personally with a child who's struggles are as profound as mine... I know they are out there, but I don't know nor am I in contact with a single one. That can be very isolating, on top of the stresses of managing the difficulties that have come from each of his medical conditions. Many of my hobbies I may have had to give up, but taking time for myself somewhere whenever possible helps keep my head recharged and in this game. Most days that looks like my workout time, or a long walk with him in the stroller. But what they say in there is correct, if you want to help someone, you have to first make sure you're standing in a safe place yourself.In general, many parents with a kiddo with significant challenges may read the specific examples in this book and think "I only wish those were the problems I was dealing with." That is not to minimize the difficulties that these families detailed in the book have gone through, but it is a very different level of functioning and challenges, and that may make this book feel less applicable to families with lower functioning kiddos, if for example, you're dealing with hours a day of a child with self-injurious behavior, or who is non-verbal, or who has significant motor challenges, or who once you got them over their sensory issues for squishy stuff thinks painting with their poopy diapers is awesome and had become obsessed with it for a period of time. But I still think the main take away points are pertinent and useful, and while not always easy to apply, can be generalized to children with different struggles.

This is a fabulous book. I'm the parent of an 18 year-old with autism and I have struggled all his life with the incredibly delicate problem of when to push and when to lay off -- with everything, from sitting at the dinner table longer than 5 minutes, to homework, exercise, reading, socializing, fixing his own bagels. The years and variety of experience between Dr. Moore and Temple Grandin shows in their pragmatic, detailed examples of successful ways to navigate the little problems that drive us crazy every day -- like the complexity of teaching your otherwise brilliant kid how to hold a broom and sweep the kitchen -- and the bigger ones -- like how to push gently and incrementally on our kids to develop their talents.Temple Grandin has overcome her own obstacles and Dr. Moore has helped countless patients overcome theirs, and you can feel the meat of their experience in this book. They both know that it's a messy, not a magic process, and involves constant problem-solving, but their examples really hold your hand and help you envision your own process. The chapter on video games has great detail and understanding of the problem, which is a big one for many families without autism to deal with.I run a nonprofit for teenagers on the spectrum, offering social support and classes, and I have recommended this book to all of the parents. I want to use these strategies to help our kids and their parents find ways out of their comfort zone and into the world of other people and constructive activity, so they can build lives.

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